the amount of fun, the amount of happiness, the amount of stress, the amount of finance, the amount of love and stability in a relationship, the amount of friendship, the amount of meaning, the amount of freedom, the amount of respect, the amount of self-esteem, the amount of entertainment, all varies at any given point of time.
That's why some days u feel like u love life more than others. Today, is a day where i dun love my life as much as other times... how about u?
I've been pinning down my thoughts every now and then where i thought i've got "something finer in life"... here's what i got so far...
1. Have u ever observed how the body sways from right to left in a queue when they're moving forward to close the gap? You should know why, the right leg moves first "the power leg.. not neccessarily true for everyone though" and then the left leg moves.. we all know this, but have we ever noticed how comical the queue starts to inch forward like cute little teddy bears swaying frm left to right and right to left even though they happen right before our eyes?
2. Prosopagnosia... know wat that is? That's the power of the net. i believe most of u dont, well neither did i.. until i wanted to check my mail 1 day and i saw it online via yahoo news. Prosopagnosia is face blindness.. meaning one's inability to recognise faces. What kind of life does one experience having that condition? We all know how the less fortunate blind, mute and deaf personnel try to make ends meet in their daily lives.. but what about these less known disabilities that society forgot to mention? What does it mean to be the vast minority and almost no one in the world truely understands how it feels like?
Tone deafeness? extra finger on your pinky? extremely fragile bones? color blindness? These are some examples of those "handicaps" that we are aware of.. but there's much more out there. And because we dun experience them, doesnt mean they don't exsist. To truely understand how fortunate you are, i guess 1 of the ways is to find out more about those handicaps, so as we can love our lives much more...
3. Whenever it comes to rectifying problems, no matter where you are, service providers act as though they are trying their very best to aid u... but the truth is.. no body really cares... all they care about is about their own well beings. Well, that is "your" job isn't it? Why would "you" care so much about the difficulties i'm having in operating this machine? Don't put me on hold? DOn't direct me to another line? They just keep directing me all over the place. I'm not a volleyball... you don't bounce me all over the place and end up at the same spot again?
The only person we can really trust is ourselves. Why go through all that trouble to ask for help when we can go through the same amount of trouble to enrich ourselves with the appropriate skills to rectify them our own? I feel this way because of lotsa incidences that happened. One of which was a day-light snatch theft which 100 over people didn't even care and 2 racist policemen turned a blind eye to... i always thought policemen where efficient and they were the "protectors"... i thought wrong.. you only have urself. That incident occurred in another country.. how about the policemen in my country?
I've had first hand experiences with them and i realised that their reaction time, activation time, took ages! By the time they came down, offenders of the law would have enuff time to cook up a feast to celebrate their escape!
4. Last but not least for the time being.. have u ever tried to move your middle toe? We have took our toes for granted and have lost our ability to control each and every toe as efficiently as our fingers. Surprsingly hard? There's a lot more "take for granted" situations which we haven discovered yet.. so try finding those.. maybe that way.. you will learn to love life more and love the way life was "made"...
Back to me? Why am i loving life lesser than other days? Love. Love. Love. Love is such a frustrating thing that it sometimes overwhelms happy times and enjoyable times you spent with your special someone. Trust is the key. how many times have u heard this before? Then ask youself, how many times have affairs been known to you based on the relationships that revolve around u? Total bull...
The keys of love... are like the keys of a piano set. Many! It's more than just trust, understanding, committment etc. You can only know when you've truely been in one. But don't do it because you're curious to know what it's like to love and be loved in return, because curiosity killed the cat... in this case... no rats were saved.
Ever felt like you are starting to lose yourself? lose your identity, lose who you really are? change is good? they say? Everybody changes.. it's just how much they do, it's just how much worse they become. For someone like me who believes everyone is evil by nature, it's a matter of how much worser they become.. those lesser are the "good" ones.
Time to open my eyes again... look at wat the world has to offer... a gateway for me to find that "meaning" in finding meaning in my life.. in finding the reasons to love life. Life is a complicated thing.. less complicated than love because love cannot be seen. That's why i'm not even trying to explain what love is... Let's not try to take a step to the heavens.. let's start from the ground first.. let's build steps along the way so that one day, we can reach the heavens.. the hard way.. because that's what life really is all about, that's what it takes to understand life.. the hard way.